THERE'S SOMETHING HAPPENING HERE, WHAT IT IS AIN'T EXACTLY CLEAR

The jungle drums have been beating for a while now, and the natives are clearly restless.  Beginning a couple of weeks ago, congressional Republicans and Fox News launched a series of specious attacks on Robert Mueller’s credibility, which quickly escalated to encompass Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein as well as the entire FBI.  Yesterday, Senator Mark Warner delivered a blistering speech on the floor of the Senate, accusing Republicans of trying to shut down Robert Mueller’s investigation.    

Speaking of shutting things down, in a perhaps unrelated development, the federal government will have to shut down at midnight on Friday unless Congress passes a budget or (more likely) another continuing resolution to fund operations until after the holiday recess.

The rest of this post is just a compilation of seemingly outlandish rumors, so take them with as many grains of salt as you like.  Empty your salt shaker.  In better times than these, I’d say they were crazy.  But in Year One of the glorious reign of God-Emperor Trump, first of his name, they’re at least plausible.  I hope they don’t turn out to be true, and I’m even hesitant to post them, though obviously I’ve overcome that hesitation.  With those caveats, here goes. 

Citizen journalists say that the Beltway is abuzz with rumors that Donald Trump has already issued secret pardons to people targeted by Mueller’s investigations.  They say there’s no law that requires presidential pardons to be public.

They also report a rumor that Trump plans to fire Robert Mueller late Friday afternoon.  Speculation is that he’d begin the process by firing Deputy AG Rosenstein, and appoint Rachel Brand (currently third in command at Justice) as the new Deputy AG.  As her first official act, Brand would immediately fire Mueller.  Meanwhile, Trump flies off to Florida for the holidays.  

A variant of this theory suggests that Republicans will also decline to extend the continuing budget resolution, so that the government shuts down at midnight.  Chaos ensues, and chaos is Donald Trump’s natural element.

Of course, if I’ve heard this rumor, so has Robert Mueller.  Given what happened to James Comey, Mueller has known from his first day on the job that Trump might eventually get rid of him.  I have faith that Mueller has a backup plan.

If anything like this were to happen, it would precipitate a constitutional crisis the like of which this country has never seen.  It would remove all doubt that Trump was guilty of obstruction of justice.  No one could maintain with a straight face that Trump and his family were innocent of conspiring with Russia to steal the election.  It would also implicate Rachel Brand (or whoever fired Mueller) in the crime, which ought to give anyone pause, even with Trump’s assurance of a pardon.

What puzzles me about this rumor is that at this point, I’m not sure what simply firing Mueller gets them, except a lot of bad publicity and more legal trouble.  Maybe “fire Mueller” is shorthand for “disband the entire investigation,” or “replace Mueller with a Trump stooge who will effectively neutralize the investigation.”  But either of those options would constitute more obstruction of justice. 

It may be that this is a real plan, designed and advocated by some of Trump’s more wild-eyed advisors, but that cooler heads will prevail and he’ll abandon it in favor of some angry tweets and a golfing holiday at Mar-A-Lago. 

Here are some possible counter-moves on the part of the good guys.  It’s possible that the legality of the Rosenstein firing might be challenged in the Supreme Court on the grounds that it was part of a plot to obstruct justice (although I’m not sure who would have standing to bring that suit). 

It’s possible that the Senate could hire Mueller in some investigative capacity to continue his work under their auspices. 

It’s possible that Mueller’s team could pack up and move to New York, continuing its work under NY Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, beyond the reach of Trump’s pardon power. 

It’s possible that on his way out the door, Mueller could unseal the multiple grand jury indictments that he’s reportedly been holding back, letting the world know what he and his team have learned about the Trump-Russia conspiracy.

It’s also possible that this is just another internet rumor.  I hope that’s what it turns out to be, and I apologize in advance if it’s a false alarm, even one that came heavily caveated. 

We’ll know soon enough.