RAVE ON, IT'S A CRAZY FEELING

"The tone! The hatred! I'm really not a bad person! The hatred! The venom,” said Donald Trump at his press conference on Thursday.   

One of Trump’s first political victims was Jeb Bush.  Jeb! was a terrible candidate, but in December, 2015, he said something eerily prescient:  "Trump is a chaos candidate and he will be a chaos president."

Yesterday, Donald Trump begged to differ.  “I see stories of chaos, chaos, yet it is the exact opposite.  This administration is running like a fine-tuned machine.”  A fine-tuned machine with the wheels coming off, maybe.  The truth is that Trump is floundering.

It turns out that actually being President isn’t nearly as much fun as running for President.  So one month into his first term, Trump decided to have fun again by launching his 2020 re-election campaign in Florida.  He actually misses Hillary Clinton, and threw a couple of half-hearted barbs her way.  But it’s clear that he needs a new scapegoat to demonize when things go wrong.  Because a whole lot of things have gone wrong in the past four weeks. 

To the surprise of approximately no one, Trump has chosen the press as his new whipping boy.  “I mean, I watch CNN, it’s so much anger and hatred and just the hatred,” he said.  And then, a few seconds later, “I don’t watch it anymore because it’s very good.”    

The whole performance was like that – a string of non sequiturs, contradictory statements, and outright lies, swinging back and forth between praise for himself and anger at his critics. 

About his wife, he said, “I’ve actually known her for a long time.”  Good to get that cleared up! 

One of the highlights of the press conference was Trump’s explanation of uranium.  “You know what uranium is, right? It’s this thing called nuclear weapons. And other things. Like lots of things are done with uranium. Including some bad things.  Nobody talks about that.”  Well, no Republicans anyway. 

“I’m not ranting and raving,” said Donald Trump, ranting and raving.  “I love this.  I’m having a good time.”  Vladimir Putin probably got a kick out of it too.